More Thanksgiving jokes

I want to wish everyone a safe and happy Thanksgiving. Here are some more jokes to tell at the table. Check out last year's jokes for some more ideas. A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one fresh enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, "Don't you have fresh turkeys?" The stock boy answered, "But they are all dead. Now how can I make them take a bath?"

What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?
If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving,"
little Timothy wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."

Have you finished off the first one?
Yeah!
Eaten it too?
Yeah!
What happened to the other one?
The other turkey is now reading our conversation, boss.

If a man wants to eat a turkey on Thanksgiving, what does a turkey want?
Ans- It simply wants to run away.

What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?
Ans- God save the kin.

What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it?
Ans- Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.

What will a turkey with a dramatic bent of mind say to another turkey on Thanksgiving morning?
Ans- To be or not to be roasted, that is the question.

The pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in amazement, the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout. Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and ran right through the defensive line. When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, "You're terrific!!! Sign up for the season, and I'll see to it that you get a huge bonus." "Forget the bonus," the turkey said, "All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?"


What key has legs and can't open doors?
A Turkey.


Gobbler said, "Doctor, help me! I can't stop acting like a turkey!"
"I see," said the doctor. "How long have you had this problem?"
"Let me think a second. Mom laid the egg in 1954..."

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims!

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such FOWL language

What are the feathers on a turkey's wings called?
Turkey feathers

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving

How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
Plymouth Rock

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
The outside

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
The turKEY

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!

Where did the first corn come from?
The stalk brought it

Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
To keep his wigwam

What happened to the Pilgrim who was shot at by an Indian?
He had an arrow escape

How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?
It hugged the shore

Thanks, for a country where nobody is allowed to mind his own business. Thanks, for a nation of finks.
-- William S. Burroughs, "A Thanksgiving Prayer"

Madden '11-The Video Game

Not really much to review here. Another Madden game with updated rosters, better graphics, and current records. However, they did change the kicking style, which I personally like more than the old way. I think it's pretty obvious when the cuts in the commentary are. I think the new stuff doesn't compare as well to the old styles, but I like it. I give this videogame an 8.5 out of 5.

Sabotaged-The Book

This book is the 3rd in the Missing series by Margret Peterson Haddix, and you need to read the 1st two books to understand it. The first is Found,the second is Sent. This series is probably going to consist of more books, so be on the look out for them. It is a little slow, but once it picks up pace it gets really good. I rate this book an 8 out of 5.

New Summoner Wars

By the title of this post you probably know what I'm talking about. The new Summoner Wars stuff is finally out! Well the game isn't able to purchased in stores yet, but if you preordered it you probably already have it like I do. Once again Plaid Hat games has released a Summoner Wars game this time, you can play as the evil Fallen Kindom led by Ret-Talus, or the Vanguards led by Sara Eldwyn. You could also play with the starter packs to create really epic battles. How ever you play, I give these booster packs a 9 out of 5.

The Last Airbender-The Movie

I'm one of those people who saw the tv show for The Last Airbender, so I'm going to say it's not superbly good. But it was a good movie. So I'll give them credit for that. The effects are great, so I give M. Night Shyamalan's newest film an 8 out of 5.

How to Train your Dragon-Book VS Movie

How to Train your Dragon is a great book, and a good movie, but they are different. 1st off, in the book the dragons are something that are caught regularly where Hiccup lives. 2ndly, Hiccup has no love life, unlike the movie, where he meets the viking of his dreams. Also, there is no dragon god leader thing. There's also other reasons, but it would take a while to say them all. But not that it was a bad movie. They both were good. But in this case, the book gets a 9 out of 5, the movie 8.5 out of 5, so the book is better.

Toy Story 3-The Movie

Toy Story 3 is a must see animation this year! If you are able to preorder online do so, because lines will be long for this movie.
Toy Story 3 recaptures the essence of its story told in numbers 1 & 2. If you liked the first two Toy Storys, you'll love this. For some people who saw all 3 movie in the movie theater, you may cry at the end. I rate this a 9 of 5!!!!

Avatar-The Movie

This movie is the coolest I've seen all year! It won its fair share of Oscars and it has a good message. For those who have seen the movie, its good, isn't it? For those who haven't, see it when it comes out on DVD.   It has good actors and even better special effects. Here are some good pics from the making.

This action thriller gets a 10 out of 5!